Does your cat love you?
Aotearoa has one of the highest rates of cat ownership worldwide, with more than 43% of households owning at least one cat… but do they love us back?
How often do you ask yourself if your cat is really your friend? Or argue with your family over who your cat adores most? Their independent nature – yet sudden attention when you shake a packet of treats – sometimes leaves us wondering: ‘would my cat miss me if I wasn’t here?’
With about 1.2 million domestic cats in New Zealand, they are a popular choice of pet for Kiwis, and for clear reason. Cats are relatively low maintenance, regularly groom themselves and are able to withstand longer periods of alone time. Mark Vette, author of Cat Zen; A Comprehensive Guide to Raising Gentle and Resilient Cats, says “they are able to adapt to a wide variety of human situations, which means they are less time-consuming for the owner and are likely to be less destructive and aggressive.”
Cats also provide their humans with significant health benefits, says Mark, including reduced risk of heart attacks and strokes, and improved mental wellbeing. How? The sound and vibration of a cat’s purring has a calming effect that can reduce anxiety, promote mindfulness, and evoke feelings of relaxation and calm.
In turn, we show affection to our cats in multiple ways – physical touch and petting, using toys to play with them, providing treats, and giving them a comfortable living environment.
But how do they feel about this – and us?
Cats, much like children and dogs, use their human caregivers as a source of comfort and security, forming a strong bond. Mark says that our cats show their love through their ability to offer solace and their affectionate behaviours. These include head bumping, purring, nuzzling against us, and their enjoyment of our petting.
Three signs that your cat loves you:
- They greet you at the door. Your cat meeting you at the door is a sign of affection. It shows they have missed you and are glad you are home.
- They blink at you. A long, slow blink from your cat is their equivalent of a kiss or a human smile. It is a sign of trust and affection.
- They show you their belly. The belly is the most vulnerable part of the cat. This is a sign of trust and comfort. It can also be a signal that they are happy to see you.
Cat Zen: A Comprehensive Guide to Raising Gentle and Resilient Cats by Mark Vette with Kim Morresey (Penguin Books) is out now.

